Her Style

Last post =]

2010-02-16T01:19:00.003+08:00

This shall be my last post if I'm not wrong. Trying to get use to wordpress blogging as it's more convenient then blogger.
Wanna make my 4 private blogs (which is quite crazy) into a wordpress that can put personal + daily blog post together in one website!!! Instead of me going into four different blog sometimes when needed, which is a waste of time since my laptop is getting slower when day pass by.

But shall keeeeeeep this blog because of it's great value =]

2010-02-14T20:49:00.002+08:00

little annoying cousin!
Monopoly deal with sister which end up in a tears due to some reason. But that tears is worth to drop =]
Ah Ma's house => Grandma's house=> Mum's Aunt house => Daddy's friend => ah ma's house => MY house!!!

Filled with daddy's friends right now!!!
My cousin was annoying =$

All in all, Chinese New Year visiting is FUN and ENJOYABLE =]

2010-02-14T02:29:00.004+08:00

more to go at facebook =]
Reunion dinner finally come to the end =] Closer bonding with siblings and mummy, same goes to grandad =] Fool around during reunion dinner and munch with my delicious KFC chicken wings and mash potato as well as my meat ball =]
And poor 2nd uncle have to eat the chicken's skin that I dislike to eat. Camwhore with everyone except xiao shu and daddy =[ Alittle disappointed but it's alright. There's still tomorrow to shot even more photos as memories.
Elder sister felt unwell after eating her dinner and vomitted thrice. So Chinatown trip was cancelled and we went home by dad's lorry. Though it's may be alittle disappointment, but I doubt that I won't complain about Chinatown's crowd if I'm at there.

Mum's side relatives tomorrrow. Freak me gonna stay away from my relative =] Simply annoying them =] Hope that Da Jie will be able to tag along with us the whole day instead of going out with him =[ Angry me if he spoiled our mood of chinese new year!!!

2010-02-13T10:57:00.002+08:00

Happy Chinese New Year!!!

wake up feeling still half-dead. A refresh bathe will maybe help it =]
or I shall sleep my 2nd round.
A beach scenery was what I'm waiting for in this coming holiday. Gonna have reunion dinner at grandma's house at night which I pray that it will went on pretty well. Maybe Chinatown after that which I may not attend it due to certain reason =[

mY Clique- love you all alright. Though there may be people who doesn't or despite our clique, but it just matter that we love one another and don't even bother to look at how people see through us. Because nobody is right to judge anyone as we are all imperfect. Wannnnna come to yours house to take ang bao =] hahaaa!!!

2010-02-12T23:52:00.002+08:00

Social studies test today =]
Followed by some lessons!!! Performance wasn't that great except for modern dance. Yeah, and principal was quite good to his students though we may not know him well at all. He give us a red ang bao. Thanks for sharing the joy out =]
Back homed to prepared everything for service later. Had chinese new year east reunion dinner after service which went pretty late. Wasn't in a full energy as I'm sort of getting tired over tired. Had a great time spending with Dion =]

a time with You~

2010-02-11T23:27:00.003+08:00

Alright! Rather tired after much shopping with Melissa for her dress at Jurong Point after making much plan on where we should go =]
lovelove Yacht shop =] Their dresses is quite unique! Moreover, I love their jean-like shirt, it make me feel so tempting to buy it =]
Hohoo! Melissa's dress was first glance through outside the shop which is quite expensive yeah. But it look nice on her yeah =] Mcdonald + Mc cafe later on for dinner.
Homed!!!

Five common test finally come to the end! Chinese and Biology test was a gone case, same goes to my english summary =[
I get distracted over certain stuffs that had happened, and causes my chinese and english test get affected. Prayed over it and it helped bits by bits.
My class was reported to the MOE over certain stuffs =S And I nearly get inside the trouble due to my sleepyness. Shall not talk much about it as it's not something to boast about. CCA was filled with quiet time + my storybook + geography + homeworks. =]

if you really wanna be like this
not making a effort in changing at all
no one else can help you up
except yourself
your promises to yourself faded away
as though they are just a dream of your
and it drift away from your memory
when days pass by.
all i could only do was that little
and the rest is really up to you

2010-02-11T17:37:00.003+08:00

Melissa bang into my metal pole twice and laughters trigger up me =]
Unlucky her because she doesn let me to post my nice post.... that's why fall into a trap =]

Melissa in pain now! Please call 995 for emergency or else she might have brain explosive =[

2010-02-10T22:39:00.002+08:00

meeting through much bad situations in the same time doesn't pleases me much. Yeah, I know that I have to continue to look straight toward the road and improve in it. Really elated much that He still see through my hard effort =] Jomaine and da Jie is able to come for Lifegroup today =]
And also wanna thanks God for Melissa for getting out of her comfort zone by chatting with Jomaine and Carel instead of playing around.
Had some games at open plaza and left at 5.30pm together with Melissa, Da Jie and Jomaine. Saw natasta upon alighting. And five of us walk home together =]
Departed when we reach each block and left Melissa and da jie only.
Yeah, wanna thanks MELISSA TAN for her great advices once again that make me reflect through my problems for this past week. Studied with Da Jie and Melissa together and making jokes through our revision =]
Sweet time spend!
Accompany her to bus-stop thus grocery for her foodie.
And thats when I just came back home posting this post =]

So Melisssa promise to have a RELAXATION outing tomorrow =] extra smile =]
Shopping tomorrow with her!!!

2010-02-09T23:15:00.004+08:00

Is there something called opting out English? Though I fall in love with english lesson, improvement was somehow invisable to me. That's mean I make zero improvement in my english. Haven cultivate yet in my basic english and how could I do such a tricky english common test tomorrow?
I wondered if my future will be in ITE after much hard effort studying and brain racking in memorizing etc.

Melissa is very funny when it come to giving advices =] Alright! First time advices through MSN with her really make me wanna laugh out can. It's lifted my laughter up! And there is one sentence that is wrong!!! Should not write it here but it will be written in my mind. (HAHA = biggest picture). She is fun to bully yeah =]

Taking time out to have a break in evaxing and sowing. Doing my best in helping those who wanna come love tag in few weeks time...

That's it...
BYeeee

tired-out

2010-02-09T17:04:00.003+08:00

Be it a better or bad changes, it lead to me feeling so stranger toward the changes. Curiousity erose me up frequenly and sensing that she is suffering inside-out by herself. Surrounding friends started to change so sudden that make me feel so different, having a mixed feeling that is indescribable. Seriously, situation inbetween our clique started to drift away as though we started to split into small groups. And I'm pondering if I am the last to know it. It's heartbreaking to hear through bad news about this and that, making my heart to feel so confused by all these recent stuffs and oncoming event.
I doesn't know if it's a stress situation? a curious situation? a tired sign situation? Or somehow God's working over it, making this situation to be so obvious to me slowly when time pass by. Mind packing with stuffs that I haven done, stuffing it like a memory card till it's gonna be full soon.
Alright, simply tired out! Drain out! Stress out!
(NOT A EMO POST)

Praying that thursday would end faster! All period during thursday is all filled up with tests. Not a single bit of period is left with other stuffs. FIVE TESTS to handle with during thursday. Two tests tomorrow!!!

How I long to be in Your presense
hearing You out
little words that pleases me much
knowing that You are there for me
till the end of the day

2010-02-08T22:09:00.003+08:00

Thank mummy for helping me to buy cny's stuff =]
Meet Joy up to tutor with her math for an hour or so. Hope that she can learn at least a few stuffs though she may be in a tired state.
Meet SiRui at control station and trained to Simei to meet the rest. Had mass shepherding and first time eat at eighteen chief. Didn't know totally that it's a famous resturant to eat. But truely, the food is really very nice except their ice lemon tea.
Pet safari later on and transport homed...

Alright, I seriously doesn't know what's up with you nowaday. You are truely changing to a person that I feel so stranger to me.
Knowing friends that I dislike once before is truely amazing =] Getting to see her good side of life.

I truely think you are annoying!!! Stealing my pen and being so daring to say that you found two pens at somewhere. Annoying "J"( idk how to spell his name). Thanks God I finally snatch back my two pens =] Shall take extra care of my pen from today onwards. And please STOP spoiling my wonderful pen!!!

Simply me

2010-02-08T15:23:00.004+08:00

All i can simply say was "I'm sorry for what I have say in a fit of anger". I regretted what I did but really hope that this relationship would not have drain away in any way. I'm soon gonna take a break Yif things continue to be the same! A haywire feeling that make me to have self-control of my sleepyness. Sorry for being ingnorance to you just because I mean well, I doesn't want another outburst to cause another relationship to drain out. All this happened so fast, there's a purpose in it.
I doesn't want this feeling of me to get rid of any friendship with anyone of you. Though I may feel curious why it have been like this and that when I step inside school. Knowing that disaster will struck me and having a bad feeling somehow.
But still, self-control and firm is what I could really do now. Maybe somehow I may walk away through halfway conversation with you, but really hope that you all would understand it.

times whereby satan put me down. But I wanna stand firm in You regardless of any disaster or situations

2010-02-07T19:49:00.004+08:00

Look dead through the way to Whitesand. Meet SiRui for a chat and thanks for helping with my social studies =]
Accompany her to Tampines for her shoes.
Bus 81 homed. Walk home with bud and a fruitful time spend with her, that let me realise alot of thing hidden inside her heart. Thanks for sharing with me =] Love ya!

Wanna priorities my time inbetween school mates and church's stuffs. Sorry for letting you all to think like that , but yeah, just wanna let you all know that I will chose the more wiser choice that will benefit others or me. And feel free to ask me out, I will maybe be free for your request. For I know that I love you all just like how I love anyone out there.

Happy Birthday Kelly Chew
been through working experience with you, which always let me wait for you and being late. All those small chat with you and little jokes filled my day up =] Hope you would enjoy much more then the other days and I will buy you a present as soon as possible. Love love

2010-02-07T12:33:00.001+08:00

tummy ache with sharp pain =[
Wanna vomit out food that I have eaten just now, but tried not to if possible.

Gonna rest awhile first =x

God's testing

2010-02-06T23:31:00.004+08:00

Mit6 teaching was great! Haven yet transferr the teaching to my sermon book, shall do this later on. Overnight at B3st bud's house =]
Feel welcomed and privilleged to be at her house all this while, as her parent really treat me quite good. And request Cindy to switch on the air-con so that I'm able to sleep even more better. Yeah, and both of us also managed to take my stuffs from SiRui's house and shopped for tibits and drink to eat later at her room =]
Also thanks God that she sleeep first that let me to do other personal stuffs. And also this little strength to let me hanged in there for doing greater thing.
Slept at 2am in the end!
so next morning, Cindy and me went out of the room and she started to sabotage me. Her parent laugh at me like i'm a clown =[
hahaas, but it's funny and feel rather shy over this.
Prepared our stuffs and breakfast at 7/11. Bused to tampines mall and meet the rest up. Collect my donation tin and stickers and started rushing with donation together with Cindy. Done finish our first round at 11am+ , hoping that we can be release. But can't! Called Mr Ong for help that I needed to be release earlier due to church service. Really thanks for his understanding that he release Carol and me earlier =]
Directly took cab after returning the tin.
Miss praise and worship =[ But it's alright, friday will have it again =]
Short meeting with East and lunch over le meridian. Chatt with Dennis about my past and present tense of life. He give me some advices and encouragements, yeah, and I'm more willing to listen to his advices.
Some video shotting and back to Centrepoint mac.
Study biology and physic for next week test =]
Seven tests next week!!!
so wanna prepared well with my study plan.

thanks God that when I'm in the ego of falling down
You are still watching over me
helping over me and guide me through
all these difficulties that I'm coping.
To drop me words that is useful to me
and all these little blessing adding up
it's more then enough.
Thanks Lord for this group that I'm in
to used me even more
to test me
to let me have problems in my life
so as to grow even more and help other
people's life through all this problem
that I have faced.
To let me have such a wise shepherd
that give me advices and encouragement
all this while during my spiritual walk
with You. In jesus name, AMEN!!!!
THANKS GOD

thanks God for this little strength that You have given me to hang on

shopping sprees

2010-02-05T13:17:00.002+08:00

Spend $120 or so on bags and dresses + belt + wallet. Finally found a zebra wallet =] Super happy=]

Hougang mall is really full of nice stuffs, but coulfd'nt shop finish due to shortage of time. Jie pay for taxi fare, so good of her=]

Yeah~ WAY to go!!! Left sandle and some items and I'm done =]
Chinese new year will be a fruitful once! I'm sure of it =]

Later having hai xing poineer and mit6 meeting!

"J" make my day! He is a joker can =] Can't really stand his evil jokes.. HAahaaaa

Shoppping =]

2010-02-04T16:59:00.002+08:00

Rush to school with "J" today =] Self- study for almost three hours, which I only manage to do finish my math and chinese homework thus some revision on Physic retest. Shopping later after hard time studying madly on tests and so on.
Four tests ongoing next weeek and I'm prepared to revised them with my plan =]

Byee!!!!

Next week test: Biology (Monday), Physic(Monday), POA( thursday), math(thursday).
Predicted that there will be more coming up!!!

Downturn

2010-02-03T19:58:00.005+08:00

Irriated through all the sneezing and running nose that I have during lesson time that causes me to wear two jackets! Downturn continue to overflow me when I recieve my physic paper which got a F9. It's a devastated case for me, I know that I didn't do well during paper time but didn't bothered to focus even when I realise it.
And still , I thought of something which is totally wrong! I cried and was in guilt for having this thought during worship time when this all suddenly pop-out in my mind. Repenting to Him and truely feel hurt for what I have done but didn't even realise that my thoughts was wrong just now. Still, God didn't blame me and send me a useful word: note pad. It help me with handling stuffs carefully etc and cried though God's response. I'm so touch by Him that He forgive me and even send me words when I did something totally wrong.

Thanks Lord~

knowing that He is blameless

Hanging on

2010-02-02T22:43:00.003+08:00

Just a bits of here and there and it's done completely. Stayed over for few minutes more due to bad performing with Jomaine =[ But she's fun to be with =]
Meet Jasmin for studying and shopping + dinner. Cheryn was there too, waiting for me at my school gate =] hehe!
Brought spag + slveeless top, it's like finally I'm able to buy one shirt. Breakthrough!(clap*) Gonna buy new sandle + white skinnies + Skirt and FBT next time...
Homed after that! Rushing over role and having a irriating runny tap nose with semi-deaf sometime, which make me frustated in times. Hahaa~ But I shall keep on try to make it to fully nice hearing =]

Byeee~ Wakie up early in the morning! So gonna get on my bed and sleeeep without thinking of my homework! Leave it at tomorrow =S

It's this little strength that let me hang on! Just because of the promises that I'm willing to hang on toward it no matter how tired I could have been struggling with.
It may be a straight "NO" , but thats when I truely want to have a break. A break that is really pleasing and without any worries.
yeah~ I'm willing to say "YES" because I know my covenant with everyone that I have promises. If you really wanna make a change, I truely will spend time with you because of what you have determine to change =]

there is no reasons for us to reason

Relaxation =]

2010-02-01T21:36:00.002+08:00

A time for me to fully relax =]
Wrapping and arranging my shelves after much time. Evaxing in the afternoon together with Melissa and Carol, and glad that Carol enjoy evaxing alot. Gonna accompany her to evax tomorrow morning. Wakiie upp early in the morning, so gonna replenish energy by sleeeping earlier.
Announcing something out: Melisssaaaa is overjoy by something during the stay at my house! Hahaa~ Helping her to advertise out =] Evil me =P

bYEE!!!
Had consecutive test till thursday =] Muggging day tomorrow for me!!!

2010-01-31T23:13:00.003+08:00

Finally had the time to buy my precious notebook and book cover =] Studied with SiRui and Jeslin till nighty, but SiRui left at 6.30pm for dinner. Went to meet her up again later for badminton, Jeslin join us later.

Backy home after returning shuttlecock and racket to best bud.

Short day for me tomorrow =] Most properly no TUTORIAL tomorrow! Happppiieee~
But just promise my mum that I will clear my messy drawers by tomorrow =[
Properly shopping afterward for CNY's clothes.

and I'm so happy that my birthday present is not over yet =]

how closeness can that be

2010-01-31T10:49:00.005+08:00

How sweet can that be... Sleeping closely to one another for warm and protection. Feeling secure and comfortable with one another. How's your relationship with your siblings, parent? Is it somehow just like this photo? Being able to be together closely just like them.

High runny nose =[
Feeling cold and hot =[
Not feeeling well~~~

Somehow, it's a period of sickness. But I won't let sickness to overwin me. There is a purpose why suddenly so many people fall asick in just a period of time. But I'm not gonna just sit there and wait for something to happen. No way! I'm gonna resume back to what I should do: Evexing + sowing. It may be somehow being disappointed that you get rejected by meeting for many times that let you give up in Evaxing and Sowing, but hey, where's your perservanance??? It's alright to be rejected, but it isn't right to give up and just wait there. I'm gonna get back to the track of sowing and evexing no matter how busy my shedule may be. God speak to me that there is no great reasons that I can stop from evexing, from doing His's work that should be done.
Busy? Tired? Dislike? No mood? Boring? Sian? don dare?
It's all our feeling!!! We are all just following our feeling instead of God's calling for us. In times of busy, there will still be a way out to evax and sowing, is how we handle it...

2010-01-31T00:06:00.002+08:00

Service in the morning -> lunch at plaza singapura -> fellowship -> shepherd's meet-> Centrepoint -> HOMED =]

2010 is mainly about making disciple-ship =] Fellowship was a fruitful once though we may just be sitting at here and there, but I enjoy this little hours of fellowshipping. Shepherd's meet at YMCA , and thanks God there won't be any dancing! But teaching was really awesome and applicable. Cheng told me something which ponder me much about it but didn't get distracted by the teaching. Anyway, fruitful time spend=]

Byee! Shall continue with my sermon =]

Yes, i will obey what's God want me to be

2010-01-29T23:55:00.002+08:00

Five more minutes to another day =]

Had group math tutor till 4.20pm. It freak me up at the last question =[ I keep get wrong answer and teacher have to repeat over and over again. Rushing over to here and there , giving advices to my best bud was what I really enjoy doing =]
Facing test that came unprepared for me to revise. And loads more coming up for the next three days at next week. It worned me up somehow, but I know when is the right time for me to rest instead of mugging for more.
Some mistakes over mit6 which filled me with curiousity.
Some shopping after that alone, to focus on what I mainly do. Brought two christianity books which may not be useful to me, but it interest me alot =]
Another day is gonna pass soon. And what's next for me?
Let's just let this question to let God handle instead of pondering over it.

focus on the things that we are doing

2010-01-28T20:03:00.002+08:00

Depriving from sleep =[ Pray that God will refresh me for the next two hours to revise with my Geography and Social Studies test tomorrow.
Went to eat with Angel after realising that Cally have friend with her. Great time spend with Angel =]

Weary now!!!

it's about how we think. Clear thinking that isn't right for us to bothered about it

Last bday PRESENT =]

2010-01-27T20:42:00.003+08:00

Came school early for sheperding =D Thanks God for Your Mighty Strength that enable this teaching not to be in a uncorrect tone and spirit.
Nafa test today, all I did was just to concentrate on talking to God =] It's doesn a matter whether I can or can't outwin you, the main purpose is to do your best. You may be proud, boastful or whatsoever, but I won't get bothered by that =D
Sleeep during breaktime. Feel refresh after that and lessons continue on. Went math tutorial awhile, then break and back to POA tutorial. It ended early due to lack of student attending lesson. So am able to go meet Easta at Safra together with Carol.
Intend to find grandma for my birthday angbao!!! Hehee~
But did one things which somehow let me regretted. Sorry grand dad and thanks for your sweet ang bao too =]
you treat me so well even though I may not be close to you at all.

sorry grandad, I'm not your great good grand daughter =[

Last Bday Cake =]

2010-01-26T22:12:00.002+08:00

Had my sweet last birthday cake eaten during library's meeting, filled with crackers and delicious food. Vanilla cake was pretty nice though =] Thanks Ms.T for the gift!!! Get to bond with new librarian through the meeting which I really wanna experience it. To get out of my comfort clique and enlarge my circle of friends.
Yeah~ But was told to stay back due to forgotten to bring library's badge =( Was told to move back the furniture to orginal place so that I am able to let off.
Meet Jasmin and Yu Ting after some time, as I was rushing throughout the time at my house. Celebrated SiRui's birthday for a short while, then accompany Jasmin for her stuffs at IKEA. Some snacks at Giant and backie home.

Some maths homework undone totally~ Getting help from Mr Ong tomorrow =[
Double tutorial tomorrow...

2010-01-25T21:58:00.004+08:00

There's a time I can break my daily routine.
A time I can shopped alone once again in a huge mall.
And I did it through today =] GIANT ROX =X
Yay!!! Have been hoping to shopped alone, much less then a huge place with a variety of things for me to shopped with. It never bore me up while shopping alone, because of those nice and delicious stuffs for me to chose =] Swweeeet=D

A time when I meet a young adult guy at public place staring at me as if I know him. Taking the same bus as him, and staring me once again for few seconds which fright me off.

A coincide time I saw SiRui at the same bus as me.

And a time I can shopped together with Shi Xuan at Pasir Ris and Compass Point. Meeting Jasmin and Karmin at Precious thots and found great book over there. A time we can truely played and have fun together, spending one hour on sandle for Chinese new Year and a heart-to-heart chat.

Sweeetie time spending with you =]

Apply "Honest" teaching today =] God never failed to remind me of "Honesty" when I want to tell lies. Yea~ It's great =D God's is awesome!!! He reminded me and wanted me to change, and YES, I will obey You Lord and change.

when will be the next time when I can fully go out without any worried?

Fruitful Sunday

2010-01-24T18:38:00.004+08:00

Still in my sleeping clothes =]
Sirui, Jeslin and Jasmin came my house to study, but ended up someone never study!!!
Later gonna bathe and have dinner with sisters =]

A enjoyable time whereby we can go out together again =D

edited~
Two hours just went past so fast =] Filled with neoprints, foodie and arcade with sisters. Have a fruitful time spending with both of them. Planning for us to have dinner twice a month together =D

It's always so different being with sisters then friends. The feeling is so comfortable =]
Lift spoil =[ But thanks God it started to be alive again after one minute. When I came out of the lift, God have reminded me of Him, "to seek Him instead of being frighten with the situation". Thanks Lord for Your reminder =]

Let's not make emotional down to outwin our spiritual life

2010-01-24T00:47:00.004+08:00

Sermon is truely applicable for my spiritual life. Wanna make a change in being more Honest, to do it through God.
Went to some indo resturant to have our lunch. Celebration after that!
Yeah~ and instead of doing nothing else Centrepoint Mac, do better things =] I wanna work even harder for God, to take good care of His's people =] I know that there may be some circumstances that needed hard effort, but I believe that I can do it...
though now sister relationship is added on into my life, meaning spending extra time with them to bond together. But really wanna make out a day or twice per months to go shopping with them =] I loveee you all!!!
So your goodie sister will make time for you both after March =D Because I will be able to step down from CCA =]

do not be afraid of what problem we are facing, but to see through the root of the problem

Turnaround Stage!!!

2010-01-23T06:55:00.004+08:00

My mind is in a turnaround stage!( Not convenient to write over here )
Had Angel's shepherding and then mine at Whitesand. Shepherding is always filled with food and drink =]
and teaching is filled with SiRui's act cute face emotion which make me wanna laugh. Pasar Malam after some shopping with Sirui. And meet this unknown guy who is really weird in the stage that he ask me whether I still remember him anot. So I'm like, asking his name which sound familiar to me, as there is a contact previously that I have in few years ago who had the same name as him. But it turn out to be a joke! I'm in a stage whereby my eyes is half-close, looking as if I'm blurr and sleepy...
Went to buy wallet and card from there afterward. Bump into MinYi and her sheeep...
Homed~~~

2010-01-22T16:44:00.001+08:00

a time at sirui's house having teaching for Angel Seee =]

Byee!!!

It's my turn for sheperding already... It's funny =0

2010-01-21T22:15:00.002+08:00

School was pretty long and normal=]
Lunch with Kelly and natty and some stroll with Kelly after that. Our duty for graduated students is change to self-study=] So I managed to do finish my math worksheet and english homework over there. Chinese teacher came to coach me with my chinese pronounication and the meaning in english which last for half an hour. Still got much more to asked chinese teacher but didn have the time to do so as I haven prepared my role. Chiong for my role which left 5 minutes of lesser. Hahaa, what's funny is, I keep begging teacher to let me off earlier, but the end , I'm the last to go out of library =S
Lifegroup was super noisy and sort of childcare. Dinner at central with all of them except YanYu and Ida. Homed!
Bathed and start my revision on tomorrow POA's test =]
So it's gonna go on smoothly.
Math test on next monday =]
Lotts of tests coming up!!!

Finally have a time to let go of my studies after days...

2010-01-20T19:28:00.003+08:00

Five rounds of toilet trip=[ (bad tummyache)
Sort of causing someone get jealous due to my fast stamina during PE lesson. And during English lesson, two guys got into a fight that led themselves settling with their conflict. After school! went to canteen with friends and have a fun chat with Mr Alvin Ng.
Meet Melissa for studying and off homed!
Will be getting angbao tomorrow =]

So...
English hw+Chinese hw+biology test=> two hours time!

Frankly, homed seem to be a place for me to study! No televsion show for me =X
and mummy hoping me to be back home early during this week due to Yoyo's pregnancy.

2010-01-19T23:22:00.002+08:00

Hectic time has ended for today~
Peasy busy for the current five hours with homeworks and roles to be done, settling some stuffs and so on.
Borrowing Sister one hour time to tutor with my E math and physic! Self-study till night.
So energy was somehow gone!
And...

Good night =]

Got to be early to school tomorrow for clique meeting =]
but somehow I think I can't make it due to my dragging =S

i'm a bad student =[

2010-01-19T17:54:00.002+08:00

During our seat at parade square, secondary 4As are told to stay back for spotcheck. And I'm caught for short skirt while three of my friends is clear! But when both teachers approach me and was about to check my skirt's length, they let me off and one of the teacher told me that because of some misunderstanding =[
Back to lesson then!
English lesson have a bad conflict with one of the guy class-mate. But God was by my side and assure me of self-control and it cool me down. Not only that, I have a breakthrough in my emotional=]. Because my tears is easy to drop down, but during the whole process of conflict, I did not cry=] Thanks Lord!
Had library meeting after our lunch break till 2.30pm. Was told to write book review and hand in to teacher when we are done. But at the end of the day, friends and me was asked to be the last to go off due to certain things that we have done wrong. She told us to reflect on what we did wrong, but all we could do was to do our own stuffs in a small corner.
Teacher call us out after half an hour and reprimanded us! Halfway through the reprimand, I cracked my bone that Cassie laugh out! It causes me to laugh out after we stare at one another. Yeah, of course teacher was angry...
Homed after getting reprimanded.
This year teachers was sort of against me=[
Just found out that Miss Liu went overseas study =[

Anyway, wanna get back to study after bathing and dinner. Bye~

thanks Lord for the reminder

2010-01-18T18:08:00.004+08:00

Sleepy Sleeepy!!!
Struggling to get my eyes awake in some lessons. Yeah, and thanks God that all tutorial is cancelled and will proceeded from the start of next week =]
Sleeeeep all the way till now~
Feeel refreshed even more to continue with my revision on oncoming tests and homeworks. Byee=]

regardless of any size of temptation, I'm willing to perservere it with Your strength

Just another day Out

2010-01-17T22:50:00.002+08:00

Time pass by that fast!!! Tomorrow is another brand new week of schooling. Though I may not feel like going back to school and wanna continue with the fun given daily, but I know that it's not what God will be pleases. So I shall let my"I don want go school" mind to continue flow me, but I won't do it with action =]

Had combine service, rush in the morning because three of us is gonna be late. So Melissa and me suggest of taking cab, and Jasmin agree=]
Cab down to whitesand and trained to meeting point. Service was filled with high spirit and 4800 people=] It's so cool, really hope that our new church will be build sooner or later.
Lastly, wanna thanks Jeslin for the treat of Chicken Rice when I doesn't want to eat my once because it wasn't tasty at all=[
Hoho, had ice-cream at some sort of shop and transport homed

Rushing to do my homeworks that I have lagged for days...
Mummy had new handphone + number in it(haha)
Tomorrow gonna be a bad day because there will be tutoral till 4pm...
Same goes to tuesday-Thursday...

2010-01-16T23:56:00.002+08:00

ScholarShip was such a waste of time!!! $400 buck only=[ Totally disappointed with the sum of $$$ because it's just little for me.
Renewal outing with Eldest and youngest sister to illuma. Firstly, there seem to be a barrier in between both my sister, and I, being standing in the middle once.
But after much time, thing start to change and we got crazy during our ride back to Pasir Ris. Surprise mum with out patching up and we had our dinner together. Some grocery together and homed=]

Sweet time together=]

2010-01-16T00:17:00.003+08:00

Getting scholarship soon!!!
Haven done with confirmation of clique setting~

So our clique shall be make smaller, into a total channel 8 language instead of channel 5 & 8.

Confirmation- Angel See, Amanda Lim, Cassie Foo, Cindy Seow, Carin Chua, Kelly Chew, MiQin, Kam Xin Yi, Shi Ping.

Nego- Carol Wong! But most probaby will be in this clique, but have to see total acceptable=]

Channel 5 Clique- Siti, Natasha, Saida
Sisterhood Clique- Angela See

C58S major clique=]

So we will be making channel 8 clique tees together at monday =]
Planning and setting will be planned by me...
Let's have a person to take care of each clique and to show out our talent skill in different areas=]
such as planning/informing/jokers/gamers
And with each and every of our skills, it will make it into a FUN outing forever=]

Hahaa, our clique is so weird but special(haha)

Will done a great propersal of Clique restruction!!!

2010-01-15T22:40:00.004+08:00

I'm mad about this phone!!! Touchscreen+keypad!!!Hope hard that I can get it=] papa please~~~

School was freaking fast today as teacher rush with homework that make us no time for other things. Hehee, but halfway while listening to Social studies's lesson, Da Jie suddenly message me all of a sudden.. Yeah=] Much happy with it and awaiting for tomorrow outing together with eldest and youngest sis together=]
Went Tampines Mall together with Angel, Amanda and Saida. Both of them left after some window shopping. So Angel and me went to Romantic Mac to study until 4.30pm. Meet Mel up and travel to Simei for retrieve of phone.
Transport to XinYi's house and accompany her dad, XinYi and uncle for dinner. Shopped around West Plaza, and got into a chat about china phone with a guy salesperson. Lol!!! China phone is so CHEAP!!! Hahaa~
Back to XinYi's house to watch tv and cross stitch =D
Homed~

Bday=]

2010-01-14T22:44:00.006+08:00

Had my first birthday cake together with my sweet clique, planning secretly and making the effort to make it a successful once. Utimately, I know that they will buy cake for me, but nevertheless, they surprise me with a 100% round cake. I'm like so surprise by it because I thought it would be a piece. Hehee, can't believe that I can cut this round cake by my ownself after 15 years=] Birthday bash later which made from my head to toe filled with cream. Group photos=]
Hahaa, never could I believe that in such a huge clique, my bday would be celebrated=]
Thanks for the nice dress and presents + card yeah=] Appreciate muchie=)

Secondly~

Had birthday celebrated by YeoSiRui. Thanks for the yogurt and cheese cake=] What's funny is that she keep asking me to close my eyes for surprises. So I name this celebration as a "close eyes suprises".

Thirdly~
Celebration with LifeGroup at Tampines 800+
Chatted with them about BGF and others stuffs till night and homed=]

Lastly~

Had birthday celebration with Mama and Baby=] This is what I'm looking forward to. This is the first time hearing mama singing birthday song to me which pleases me much and it's sort of shy because of the way she mention my name in english. Hahaa, but it's really a joy to celebrate with my mummy because I have been wanting it for years.

So my 15 years of wish is accomplish: which is to celebrated my birthday=]
I'm so glad for their effort and time spend=]
Love you all!!!

So there was alot of birthday song today~
I'm happy much with it=]

2010-01-13T20:42:00.004+08:00

Year 2009 have really been in the ups and downs for me, facing with family problems and running away from house and purposely going home at pass midnight, crying almost every night and even attempting to commit sucide, desire to become rebellious and even have the intention to become true ah lian. Not only that, got lock-out in times and running away from counsellor and even have to live with one of my cca teacher due to lock-out. Slashing myself in every small little hurt that I have recieve, using matchstick to burn my skin, using my head to bang against the wall, sliding against rough wall causing bruises, strangled my neck etc. When get bullied by classmates, all I could do was to cry inside my heart and to act strong infront of them, pinching my skin to hold on to my tears.

But things got into a change in March 21! Things wasn't great at first, slashing myself was what I haven quit during that period of time. But things slowly got to a change and my lively and laughters increases, with me patching up with youngest sister and mummy. Letting me to know the true self of how to handle with my hurt that I have face, and every little problem that I have face in my life.
Forgiving those who have hurt me previously and to let the past go off. Life was somehow so great and fun, meaningful and filled with great activites ahead of me. Building up my character to a better once and experiencing the love that is given to my friends and teachers and family members out there.
In times, difficulties do come, but I know the purpose of the problem is and that's what make me to stay firm even more.
God have been with me even when I haven knew Him, because whenever I walk home in the night in a narrow pathment, I could somehow feel that I'm totally safe and that someone is out there protecting me from any harm. Thanks Lord!
Maybe it's all planned to be like this.

Before

After

Knew more friends and even learn to create clique outings and chalet stay together. Had much fun with friends that I knew after I become more socialable such as XinYi, Shi Ping, MiQin, Siti which I have made and becoming closer to Angel and XinYi and not forgetting my best bud, Cindy. My serious 6 years bud, Cassie Foo and my annoyin sister, Cindy Chua. Hahaa, not forgetting eastas sister in christ out there whom have do a part in my life and also other friends and teachers who have truely mean alot to me...
Just wanna say I love you all alright???

So I'm gonna be 16 years old in few hours time =[
How sad am I!!!
But it's gonna be a renew year for me. I wanna buried behind all my pasts that I have made! But still missing the happy times with all my friends out there and God's blessing and uncondition love to me...
Hahaaa
This year birthday gonna be different once from my 15 years of life! I'm gonna make it a great once=]
Have recieved 2 birthday gifts which is two tests tomorrow!!! A gift that make me know that I must continue to strive hard for my studies.
Thats all~

Byee!

First time mummy buying me cake which I'm anticpating much=]

2010-01-12T17:59:00.002+08:00

School life is getting much hectic, filled with starting of tutorial from tomorrow onwards and also library restructure. Join decor which I hope I will get in to the team, and really looking forward to librarians outing together, bonding together etc.
Meeting was somehow too overcrowded filled with around 70+ students, causing games to be called off due to lack of space.
Some briefing and off we went homed~

Filled with excitment when I recieved tap tap revenge game! All thanks to MiQin=]
Two more days and I'm gonna be 16 years old=[
Misses my secondary three days together with cliques and outing... But what I could do is to look forward to my pathment instead of looking back.

In times, how I wish that I could have my one day for a stroll and breeze at pasir ris park, filled with fresh air and shouting out all my stress that I had handle in time. Childhood life is so great!

how i wish I could just spend all my time to serve You

2010-01-11T20:10:00.003+08:00

Had POA test which went on smoothly=]
Energy was somehow gone that I struggled to open my eyes in times during Biology and Chinese lesson, looking at the clock hunging on the wall and praying that time would struck 1.30pm.
But things gone back better after lunch with Kelly, Cindy and Natty. So managed to meet Angel for teaching instead of tomorrow, which is sort of rush and I doesn't like it...
Ended teaching at 4pm and went to Central to buy food...

Sleeeep after I went home~
And later I'm gonna study!!!

I want to spend my 3 days of 15 years old with joy and laughter!!!!!!!!!!!!

2010-01-10T21:56:00.002+08:00

Filled with confusion~
Haha!!!
Studied today with SiRui, Jasmin and Jeslin at whitesand mac.
Homed at night and feel weary~

Carin is tired!!!

Actually school restart is daily tired=[

But thanks God next week only got 1 CCA day which is at tuesday. Had meeting which I wondered is about what =}

From third week onward, it's gonna be a hectic week for me to handle with two days of CCA=]
Hahaaaa~~~
God, how I wish I could use that time to evexing =[

2010-01-10T11:48:00.002+08:00

In times of things that we desire to get but it's aint us whom is chosen to take, think of the negative things that of the function instead of straining the relationship inbetween sibling =]

Yeah~
Thanks God for letting me to realise what I could do, to do the best decision and not affecting any relationship=]

2010-01-10T00:22:00.003+08:00

Emotional down due to certain reason! But after a chat with SiRui, it's calm me down alot which I really wanna thank.

Anyway, had meeting after lunch and learn afew new things though I have attend sowing meeting before. Dinner at thai and ate pineapple fried rice with Li Xuan, but didn eat much as there is pineapple...
Study at centrepoint later and transport homed
All I could know is: I'm tired that I just wanna sleep without bathing! And I'm gonna do this, just because I'm TIRED OUT~~~

Dad promise me to buy me something in two months later. I excited by it but doesn want to have high hope on the promises...

Seriously, I should treat my dad better though he may be rough with talking! I wanna accept him, even his flaws that he have...

i want to give with a willingly heart=]

2010-01-08T18:44:00.001+08:00

It's weird that when I sleep longer, I will get tired even more...
Anyway, school was as usual, normal and fun! Intend to coach Cindy with her math together with Cassie, Angel and Mi Qin, but doesn't have the mood. So Kelly, Angel, MQ, Cindy and me board two bus to TP since there is open house there...
Yeah, so throughout the walk, went with Angel as the threesome of them keep hide here and there which I dono what happen to them. Saw Florence over there and she pass me a card, thanks! Saw two EA1 people over there too~
Yeah~ overall, still have the interest to go to vet course, but the salary doesn seem to be that high and also I'm frighten to inject other animal =[
Didn't manage to go to accountancy couse because it could not be found...
So meet the threesome and transport home
Very tired~~~

Studying POA and quiet time since I have to wake up early tomorrow.

2010-01-08T18:29:00.003+08:00

2010-01-07T22:07:00.002+08:00

I'm beginning to truely fall in love with English!!! Learn new words today and apply three words to the compo that teacher told us to do =]
Yeah~ But things turn into a change when it's POA lesson(last lesson). The teacher start to jokes around which doesn't interest me that much because I mainly wanna focus on studies. But her worksheet save the day because while she is there talking about her story, I managed to do afew questions.
Went to tamp together with XinYi, Angel and Mi Qin for lunch and Mount Zoin. Departed with them later and went to take bus 291 to Shih Ching's house for tutoring. Finally studied finish sec three math topics and I'm prepared for next week test with no flouting during test.
Studied new words by reading newspaper and finding chim words that I doesn really know. Gonna make use of those new words that I have learn=]

I'm wanna wanna have BREAKTHROUGH in my english grade! Instead of the usual grade 5, I want grade 4!!!

Disappointed with me could'nt be able to make it for two service=[
I'm disappointed!!!

2010-01-06T22:08:00.006+08:00

Phone get confiscated during Social studies lesson=[ This lesson taught me not to use handphone anymore during any lessons anymore and to fully concentrate on lesson even if it's not important or what. Had great learning during each and every lesson, and falling in love with English and have the desire to really find out all their meanings that I doesn't know which may take much time. Anyway, seating with boy really made me feel alittle stymie, but get better after sometime.
Angel, Amanda and me went to study at foyer while XinYi and MinQi is having tutorial at library till 3pm. Bus 21 to tamp area and meet Carol and off we went to Shih Ching's house for lifegroup. They left in the middle of Lifegroup except Angel, but at least they come yeah, which I really wanna thanks God for.
Hope they will come again=]

Wanna complete Loyang Secondary School, by FAITH!!!

And wanna thank God for Angel and her mum=]
Also had great feedback from all of them which is FUN + interesting=]

Mugging hard for english dictionary for three hours.
Quiet time soon in few minutes time. Still wanna prepared some revision for math for next week test..

In times of difficulties, we still praise Him

2010-01-05T23:49:00.003+08:00

Quiet time in the afternoon and fall asleep directly after quiet time. Wake up and went to eat my dinner and get ready to bathe and prepare my math revision till 11.40pm. Gonna continue revising more by tomorrow after school at tamp together with friends.
School have idea change so much that I needed time to get used to it. Hope that I won't have two days of CCA per week which add on to my timing and it's sort of wasting time. I would rather use that time to study even more...

Get prepared for any oncoming tutoring already~~~

calm down when things get so bad/stress

2010-01-05T14:21:00.004+08:00

School with clique would alway be filled with laughters and joy=] , thats what mainly our clique won't die off easily=D
Had first lesson paying total attention to chinese teacher teaching which I haven been doing this for previous year. It's really a time to change and to know the right time to talk/play already. I'm in secondary 4 and feel rather old in my school.
Hahas, anyway school life has always been great with friends and also air-conditional classroom.
Have 2 and a half hours of free period and teaching start for Chinese and math lesson only=]
Shall be fully normal from tomorrow onward. Gonna have tutorial at every monday and wednesday, hope the timing won't crash with caregroup time=[

Hopefully A.A.C.X is able to come tomorrow=]
love you all yeah=D

2010-01-04T19:26:00.002+08:00

School and discipline chat was such a slacking time for me! Had break and we gather together as a clique and have seaweed that Cassie have brought =D
Thanks for the card=]
Mother tongue after break! Last lesson of biology and off to meet Angel, Mi Qin, Shi Ping and XinYi for study and lunch.
But at the end, didn't study but follow-up on Angel which last for hours. Haha, really appreciate much that she take the time to listen what I have say, and even response when needed. Yeah, Angel, you are so cool manx!!!

Went to Simei for some reason after follow-up with her till 5pm+.
Straight homed=]

Spending time to write cards etc and tomorrow is Amanda's birthday=]

2010-01-03T20:46:00.003+08:00

Cut my hair alone( first time) and mum sort of doesn't believe that I dare to cut alone. Meet SiRui at her house downstair after haircut and bus to Elias Mall for her Hair cut! Went toilet halfway while chatting with SiRui and saw Cindy over there. Miss her so much that I heart her=] She Misses me too=]
Travel to Pasir Ris for some food and drink and train to Expo. Brought little stuffs over there, could not find what I wanna get =[
Back to Pasir Ris for stationary which cost over $20 but I'm happy that I got alot of new colourful pens. Had durian chendol with SiRui at foodcourt after our visit to library. Homed after chat with her =]
End of holiday shopping lasted hours together with $60=}

Mum wondered what I buy that causes me to spend that much(haha)

And I'm mad about pencil box that I brought 4 pencil box to school tomorrow and my family members say me crazy...

2010-01-03T00:09:00.004+08:00

Firstly, truely wanna thanks God for reminding me not to rely on Human being but on Him when I wanna get help from human being. As I had phobia suddenly at bus-stop while playing with SiRui's phone. There's this thoughts of giving up on playing the games with MinYi but a strength that told me not to do so but to perservere it till the end. So I make it till the end and God rewarded me by not letting the fear to trigger but to Stop it totally( in the past, when I have phobia, I wont even dare to get close to music as it will trigger me even more). Looking at how God working on my fear amazed me much.
Had Usher interview which lasted half an hour. Meet MinYi and fetch Angel from control station and some drinks. Service was filled in high spirit though I am having runny nose. Feel great for Angel that she is very interested in our service etc, keep it up Angel, wanna see you to grow more and build up your character to the next level=]
Had lifegroup lunch and some game before attending Cheng Lee meeting. Wanna filled myself with courageous and to try and communiate with the lower sec, and to complete Loyang Sec!!!
Marina Barriage after meeting~ Cam-whore with KarMin, Angel and Gladys. Had fun over there and happily running here and there just for the kite to fly to the highest level.
All the strength that I uses may tired me up, but hoho, I still got this strength to do my quiet time=]

Gonna spend my last day shopping and cutting my hairs=]

(every photos/previous photos to be uploaded in facebook)

2010-01-01T22:56:00.003+08:00

after years of hoping to go Geylang, and I finally went today=] Those who went: Florence,Jeslin,Mabel,Shi Xuan, Melissa,Jasmin and Germaine. Seven of them went for their dinner whereby they eat frog( so gross). And finally I know how Prositiute is like =S , they look normal to me, different is they wear low cutting only~
Shall not talk about it much!!! Had durian shared among four person and transport home. Thanks for your support yeah =] , now I finally know why people like you as a friend =]

Tomorrow gonna go nexus alone due to usher interview. Haha, actually MinYi was right to say the reason why I join Usher, it's because I wanna serve the KOG and somehow it's a nice ministry which suit my character =D
Meeting Angel for breakfast since interview end at 11am~

2010-01-01T03:13:00.002+08:00

Have countdown at Pasir Ris Park today~ Before that, went to Florence's house to rest and play monopoly deal with few of the Easta people.
Travel to Germ's house to by taxi with Karmin+ShiXuan+Germ at night and now Germ is currently so annoying at my side reading out what I'm tying +.+

2009-12-30T22:22:00.002+08:00

Falling asleep soon=]
Went for Caregroup and then hours of practices.
Had fun over there though it's tired standing for hours...
Dinner with unit at Marina Square foodcourt and homed

2009-12-30T01:55:00.004+08:00

Backie home=]
End work at 1.15am but throughout the entire work, I think it's just on counting stocks and it is super easy. Earn $23 in total, cab fare is $9.90 and I'm gonna retrieve back soon by 11 hours.
Yeah~ so was looking at the calendar just now and realise that school gonna start soon. And I have created a study schedules daily till 6pm/6.30pm. Currently fixing a tutor timing and day for the start of next week =]
Tutor is fixed!
Tuesday and Friday- 6.30pm-8.30pm
Monday shall be school revision with friends or alone till 6pm.
And so shall tuesday and friday be revision till 5.30pm with friends/alone
I am MAD about studying. But not to forget about quiet time daily at night 10pm =]
and CCA is consider my rest day on Thursday. Wednesday shall be my spiritual day=D
Yeah, so I'm settle with everythings! It's all up to the outcome already.
Lastly is shepherding!!! Nevermind, shepherding is three weeks or one month 1 time if I am not wrong. So most properly can confirm with school-mates in our once again clique studying daily =]

And I'm gonna planned my this sunday out shopping for books/handphone strap/bible/stationarys for school and lots more =]

God never forsake me once

2009-12-29T00:14:00.002+08:00

Chionging for this post because my eyes is half dead now~
Went for my last day of work together with SiRui, Jasmin and Shih Ching. We spit into two group and started our block at B.R
Done with just two blocks over there and threesome of us wanna stop doing but Shih Ching continue to do.
Went to mac and meet boss alone to get pay=D
Home with Jasmin and S.C, bathe etc and went to Parkway Parade with Jasmin till 12am and I reach home like finally!!!

2009-12-28T00:46:00.002+08:00

Something that I really wanna share out to everyone!!!
Prayer is powerful!
God send me word of assurance yesterday that really put in much faith in praying to God when situation happen, instead of relying on people first. God's power is so amazing though it may be easy, but the outcome is really very awesome. Try it out manx and you will know how I feel during the time when God really just calm me down etc which I needed the most.
Yeah, and also don't forsake God's word that have been given to us, obey Him and remember what words He send to us, because it's not only useful to our life, but on other people and perhap on your sheep life. You would never know until you note it down and when someone share with you their life problem, you can greatly use these God's word and help them in solving their problems.
Secondly, I also learn that christian age doesn matter much. We can still be better then them though they may be in christ much longer then us. So with what I have learn, I know I can be better then them though I may be younger then them.
Thirdly, to really focus on the correct things and to spend time out to really solve the solution instead of throwing it inside our life or saying things like "i don know how to change etc", it's really useless when we say that, it's also preventing us to grow more for God and just let these negative thoughts to overflows our life...
It's totally WRONG!!! You gotta do something with it if you wanna make a change in this area!!!

Come On!!! Rely on God first though He may not be a instant reply, but He is the one and only healer that heal us all. He never once forsake me with the challenge that I am fighting to. He is always by my side and watching over me. He know me the best of all!!!

God's word is forever and ever powerful! So don't forget His words but keep it in our mind or note it down yeah!! It's help million times in our life with God that make us to grow even more and more!
Yeah~ It's also let me realise that though I may not remember the verse because I'm not good in remember number etc which I can't help people with His verse, but God's words help me to help others. Thanks God=]

and Lastly, I wanna share what I do today =D
watch home alone which SiRui told me the movie is like so long ago, but I'm a noobie in tv progamme because I don't often watch tv in my free time. Yeah, went to Germ's house together with Jasmin to play guitar hero with Shi Xuan and my designer. Went to eat at KFC together with germ and jasmin then revise my math and POA... Homed after that...
Thanks for sharing your problem with me =D

Jiayous for both of you! Really hope that you both can make a change in your life yeah...

2009-12-27T01:22:00.002+08:00

First time celebrating Christmas party in a whole unit which was filled with gig sister and brother in christ due to the theme =D
Played hamburger and I thought that there will be gift if I win in every round, but didn't realise that it's a forteit untill I heard someone say the word. All my effort fly off~ But's it's honor that we can dance instead of seating down (HAHA), I shall think it in a good way okie =]
Have gift and cards exchange and easta shot.
Homed after that~

God is our assurance. He keep His promise and every little blessing that we have recieved amazed us much =]

2009-12-26T14:59:00.002+08:00

Christmas cards
Christmas cards
christmas cards
christmas cards
Christmas cards

It's fine for me to write cards for everyone, but it's isn't great for me to draw because I doesn know how to draw =S
Artist needed!!!

Artist number please???

2009-12-25T22:53:00.002+08:00

Merry Christmas everyone on earth =D

Overnight yesterday as a unit at Jeslin/Florence's house. Angel and Angela overnight too and it's very fun but tired =S
Christmas service was nice in the first part whereby they dance and sing=D
Over to Germ's house at afternoon after buying hotdog bun at Ikea with ShiXuan. Have three times of bad diarrhoea that make me stop playing guitar hero. Went Tampines Mall with Germ, Jasmin and Karmin later to buy their $5 present for tomorrow christmas party =D

So when my tummy ache, my phobia rise up and tummy become more pain that I started to pray during the three trips to toilet. Doesn't wanna rely on human being but on God help, because after every prayer, God just calm me down and ache went down. It's great isn't it?
so while during one of the toilet trip,
I wondered~
how I wish this fear of mine would be gone, so I will be able to listen song freely as I desire. To have a much more carefree life that I wanna it to be. O Lord, help me~

Written 10 or more cards at germ's house already. Just left afew more cards and it shall be done.
One card= 15-30minutes taken! Quite slowww~~~

2009-12-24T00:42:00.002+08:00

Miss my wednesday time post =(
Been busy around for hours with confirmation of vistors and contacting old contacts.
Meet Angel and MiQin for shopping at Peninsula and suntec city, and I brought a bag which is a christmas present of mine from mummy and christmas cards.
Walking here and there searching for Mi Qin LED light, but could not find it at the end. Back homed at 7pm+ and rushing for this and that, praying that my phone will be back alive once again.
And it did =D
God answered the prayer!
At first, only afew button can be function, and among the few, one button can search through my contact list =), it's amazing...

and after hours... My phone each and every function came back alive!!!

Isn't it amazin???
I thought that I could only manage to bring in 2 or 3 people tomorrow, but the number rose up and up, with my little sister attending the church event too =) I'm really touch by God.

Thanks God!!! All my hardwork is paid off~~~
God see through our hardwork and reward us =D

AMEN!!!!

2009-12-22T23:13:00.001+08:00

spending time of my own right now =]
though my mind is handling with tomorrow stuffs~

No faith for all of them to attend my event =[

2009-12-21T22:58:00.004+08:00

times whereby there will be a period of time being so drift away from God that you had forgotten to do some basic thing such as saying grace etc.
Yeah~
And though I'm in this condition right now that I forgotten to say grace in times and even doing quiet time in times, but really hope that I can stand up again and continue to run toward to the race...

busyness really killed!!!

Father Lord, just a times with You. just a day out with You is all I wanted now. To be repentance and follow Your ways. Let not make this christmas to stress me up, to busy me up~~~

2009-12-21T12:44:00.004+08:00

Evaxing later with Melissa and properly Sirui too~

Hope that it will be a fruitful once~
really hope that people will convert =]

pondering whose in my clique???

So I make my answer just right here: A.A.A.C.C.C.C.G.K.K.M.N.P.S.S
though not everyone may love each another characters in our clique, but it's alright. Our task is just to open our heart for them to come in =]

I love my buds~

2009-12-20T21:59:00.002+08:00

Melissa came to my house doorstep without me fetching her, smart of her!
Bathe and prepared everything then went off taking cab to Whitesand. And she fright me twice with her lost of wallet! Trained to Somerset after all the food that we have eaten at Whitesand. Watch 6.30pm new moon and we got almost 3 hours to slack etc before the start of our movie. In the beginning, it was somehow dead, but when time pass by , we get crazy about bra topics. Watch the two hours movie, and the ending part make me feel uneasy because my pee is coming out!
Melissa is still there laughing at me when we got into the lift, begging her to faster for toilet. And she started to become so called as acting lustful during our ride back by train.
It's been a fun day out =]
Chunks of jokes and hitting her during train...
Meeting her tomorrow during evaxing if I'm not wrong~

Didn't get to meet SiRui today due to the late timing.

2009-12-19T21:41:00.003+08:00

Giddy day~
Bad worship and praising =(
Shortage of sleep!!!
Nearly just faint off~~~

But still, meet a new friend over there at Plaza Sing. Her name is call Ying Ling and she is cute can~ Some fun event and macdonald for dinner/slacking time. Back home early as I'm feeling quite tired and not much mood to do anything.

Sermon haven done copy. Same goes to Camp booklet!!! Camp bag not totally unclear and just throwing all those unclear stuffs at a bag. Shelves is either in a mess or squeeze everything at one corner. Haven update for LG stuff!
Yupp~~~ And I'm alway force to wake myself up instead of a usual + comfortable without people disturbing me sleep...

When shall these undone things be done???

Intending to just come back at 7pm during almost every service if there is nothing on.
Night time waiting = L4D , so for me is waste of time!!!

spending time wisely

2009-12-19T00:14:00.002+08:00

Trying all ways to bring in more people for tomorrow and next thursday christmas event. Anyone interested you may just contact me: carinchua123@hotmail.com~
Evaxing for an hour with EA1 and EA2, then went to romantic Mac for food and game. Train to suntec was a waste, so went to Ka Min house awhile with sc and Jasmin.
Homed later~

Contact coming: 1 confirm yet disappointed~ Another not confirm but hope that she would come.

Bye~

it's not a good way! Should change the way I evax le~

2009-12-17T23:40:00.002+08:00

Devotion in the morning~ Glad that XinYi came and made my prayer to be answer =D
Evaxing in the afternoon with Melissa and then went to meet the rest after an hour or so of evaxing. Some planning for flea market etc and soccer then back home.
Tired and sleepy~
Didn't have much time to clear my stuffs and boss is comin tomorrow!!!
Shall pack everything now!!!

2009-12-16T23:48:00.005+08:00

3daystwonights camp finally come to the end. It's been a great time being able to spend so much time worshipping, praising God and even fellow-ship together as one whole unit/caregroup. Learn alot through there that God had somehow spoke to me=D

-to focus on worship/praising and not on the musical instruments.

-to have the urge to pray for others.

-to know ways about helping newie by putting them in our shoes on what we dare/not dare to do when we are a newbie( example:when I'm a newbie, my heart have the desire to jumb and sing freely during praising time, but I just decieve myself by not doing it in fear of how people look at me)

-saying tongue language aloud with no fear

Yeah~ it's a fruitful camp that I have grow much more in. To have the desire to really serve the Kingdom of God and help the lost out there.

One thing that I had sin through the 3 days two nights camp is : I hunger myself till I nearly faint out, till I can sense that my bone is eaten up and being feeling so weak. But God still give me strength to listen to Dennis short meeting with EAST sisters and brothers and to really bear with the weakness that I have.

Thank Lord for everything and anything. To speak to me and let me grow in areas that I wanna grow in. To let me have the focus on doing my devotion and having high spirit to learn Your words and also to praise and worship You highly though I eat just one meat.

I praise You O Lord~

2009-12-16T23:47:00.001+08:00

2009-12-13T22:22:00.002+08:00

Camp is just in few hours time! Done with packing of bag and slept quite long for today =D
Meet Melissa for her haircut and YanYu came and join us for some grocery. Played monopoly deal at macdonald and then accompany YanYu to her house to take bank book to update while Melissa set her camp objective.
Melissa came my house after that to play with dog and playing with my piano which she failed. Bring dog down for a walk to fetch Melissa to her bus-stop and homed.
Bathing and preparing myself for camp.

You give me purpose in my life

2009-12-13T01:00:00.002+08:00

Service in the morning, had affirmation teaching which I wanna apply it in my life. And not only to affirm people, but to evaluate on their spiritual life though it may need courages. But thinking in a positive outcome rather then getting our mind get bothered about the bad points written on the evaluation paper. It help them grow through the bad points that they recieve from others although it may hurt the person. Everybody have it's part to grow in, nobody is lack from growing more.

Lunch at Plaza Sing and monopoly deal after that. Had caregroup discussion which end quite long and to Istana Park for some games. Back to Centrepoint mac for chat and transport with sirui. Tired but haven confirm everything. It's been busy day for me! Need time to settle my camp stuffs and everything that I needed to do before going to camp.

everyone had it's part to play in~

2009-12-11T23:14:00.001+08:00

Freaking super duper hungry now!!! Last eaten at afternoon with just just a plate of chicken rice + 3 pck of milo. Currently can sense that my muscle is eaten away =( feel terrible worse!!!
Hit 1.6k doors today and really thank for boss biscult + treat of milo + aircon + comfortable seat and awesome praise from him =]
Help-out awhile and sent shih ching to bus inter and off to window-shop at compass point. Fall in love with Pepper Plus and 77 street clothing! Borrowed some books from library and off home since I donhave $$$ for dinner with XinYi, Jasmine and her daddy at downtown.

So now I'm suffering from starvatiion~
A bad once and it''s the bad of all the starvation that I had recieved.
Doubt that I will live that Long with so much starvation that I have recieved.

2009-12-10T18:26:00.003+08:00

Went early to practice leading first part of worship with Florence and MinYi. So the practice was rather a weird once, because I asked for real worship which is funny because only got 3 peoples. Yeah, so when devotion start, I doesn't want to lead worship because of fear of wrongdoing and lack of confident in myself. But after much persuade, I agree with being a worship leader and thanks God everything went on smoothly.
But there's a breakthrough in me which I am much happy with. Because previously if I doesn't dare to do the roles that was given to me, I would have the intention to skip devotion/caregroup, but when I recieve the message that MinYi and me gonna be worship leader, I'm like in my normal self without thinking of skipping it. Instead, I agree to go for practice =D
Really glad, because I have been wanting to grow in this area in my spiritual life.
Leading worship for the first time is cool, because of the Holy Spirit living in me. Great devotion for today as well.
Caregroup was idea fun with unwell prepared game, but everything goes on smoothly. God is awesome.

praise the Lord

2009-12-09T20:26:00.003+08:00

di got a butch of FUN clique =]
work Work WORK.... It's fun to be able to work with friends =D
SiRui is great that she done 4 blocks with just 10 minutes break, some encouragement for her( clap clap).
Salary rise up also which made me to be so happy for minutes that I keep on mention about the $5. Awesome working day!!! Went to loo halfway while doing my block, because I can't tolerate much and I just ask the auntie for lending of toilet and she accepted it. It's amazing, isn't it? God is our provider, we wont lack anything, AMEN!
Throwing a butch of flyers into the locker is so cool, because it lessen my bag's weight and problem. I feel way too great working in that job, learning new things and being able to be spiritual also. Hahaa =D
I feed a kitten with my $$, so good of me =D
I feel that I praise myself too much. Alright, shall stop praising and go back to my spiritual way of reading bible.

Tution cancelled last minutes due to unavailable, but it's alright.

Application: To encourage people more =]

2009-12-08T23:31:00.002+08:00

Quite tired that I yawn much during bus ride with Jeslin, freezing like I'm at snowcity. So nowaday friends are coming to ask about recommendation of flyer distributor that I work as which somehow worn me out sometimes. Because of the unavailablity and have to make-up for work etc, asking me all sorts of questions about the job that rather make me wanna ignored until they called me. And having to worry much about their attidute toward the job as it's me whom I am reprimanded, but not my friends. But one thing I wanna thanks God is that I know this boss I know that he treated me well as a employee.
Devotion and I have to tell myself inside about the important of devotion instead of lying at the bed etc which really help me not to be late =D
TP to have lunch and to germ's house until 10pm. Waited for them to eat finish their dinner and off bus home with Jeslin. So had some chat with Jeslin which is a tough once due to the yawning and freezing condition.
And when I'm online, Kevin started to ask whether wanna watch geminids at saturday 2pm, and I'm sort of curious what's that but not that much interested to go as I have much things to do which I simply haven done finish doing.
Outing with clique won't be so pleasing to me nowaday, including camp and christmas because of "busy". Seriously, I need to give myself one day break, switch off the phone and reflect everything and have a better planning to make myself less busy and stress-out.

Come on, it's holiday and not school!!!

I want to come into Your presence daily

Great day Great teaching

2009-12-07T23:24:00.004+08:00

Here I am to post again even though I am quite busy handling with some stuffs right now. Haven really pack finish with my stuffs and camp is really coming so soon into my presense. CLC1 teaching teach mainly on caregroup and it's fun. Had a lifegroup mix with guys and girl, and for now, I just remember Nicole, Shi Ming, Jia Min, Prisoner, Dragon and one more girl is in my lifegroup for half an hour. Jia Min and me is the gamemaster and we each had to think of one game. And yeah, testimony was ideal a funny once, but though, really feel glad that he came to know Christ after much of his difficulties in life. So we had a great fun as a lifegroup for half an hour =]
After that, we are to form into our group of gamemaster, holycomm,testimony. And I manage to get some great ideas for game and I'm leading game this week. Yeah, but I prefer to rely on God's guidence much=]
Had sweet time through the last lesson knowing much people=D
Dinner after that with SiRui and JiaMin at Long John silver. Went for window-shopped at 313 somerset and off homed.
On the way to my bus, I sit at the last row , and so the sitting arrangement is like" boy boy boy girl boy". And I'm the only girl can. It freak me out because the guy was super close to me that his shoulder touch my shoulder sometime =S But thanks God it's a hunk guy(haha). Not lusting... =P

So gonna do quiet time and some spirtual storybooks to let me get tired.

2009-12-07T12:10:00.002+08:00

Counting on the dates, camp in coming soon in just one week time. It's didn amazed me much and bothered about what will happened etc, because I didn't even had the time to think about it. But on the other side, pondering on evexing and sowing people and bringing them to christmas event at 24 Dec, which I had only few weeks to do so to bring in as many people as possible. Planning for evexing is an easy task for me and others, but having a right and correct attidute isn't that easy. But that doesn't mean I should follow what my emotional told me, but maybe to have a short prayer and reflect everything=]
Yeah~ So Carin is gonna be right back evexing and sowing in perhap few days time.
Byee...

rely on God's strength and not our strength.

2009-12-06T23:08:00.004+08:00

suddenly had the mind of reflecting one thing that had been preached yesterday. Yeah, I believe that alot of people out there always find it easy to go out with friends, have a chat with friends on the phone etc but through God, it's like even spending 10 minutes of time to pray and give thanksgiving is sort of hard for us to do so.
Why? Because we doesn't need God and treat Him like a santa Claus(just like the speaker had say).
And I doesn want to be one of them who treat God as a Santa Claus.. But to have a short prayer + quiet time frequency ^.^

A fruitful time spend on packing all my stuffs, doing devotion and writing my sermon =D
CLC1 tomorrow =D

2009-12-06T17:46:00.003+08:00

Bad cramps for hours over hours. Vomit out the milo that mum had make for me. Felt so uncomfortable and hoping that time would hop faster.
Gonna go bathe soon since nobody is at home. Still had to packed all my drawers again as i keep on stuff new things inside my drawer untill it overload. Need new drawer, but mum say I already take up the most portion of drawers among my two sisters.
Gonna throw all the stuffs and find a new drawer later, I will always have idea to store my item neatly =P

2009-12-05T23:55:00.002+08:00

3 Days 2 night chalet- first day of the chalet, we are able to bring our own friends come to join the games that Mi Qin and me had created. Had some introduction among us and some hand games which end up smoothly and fun. Amazing race was not well prepared and it end up missing one part of it and I manage to change the last part to a rather different once =D Lunch at chalet after that. Yeah, and before my friends come, se7en of them went crazy and started to cover my mouth/pull me up/grab me/hide my stuffs etc that I got a blue-black now!
Had a early night sleep since there is only 4 people overnighting =D
Second day of chalet, Cindy + Shi Ping + XinYi came and se7en of us watch incredible tales movies that I had brought. Went to Jurong Point and AMK hub and off back to chalet~ Some horror and vampire movies and nightwalk! Slept at 3am++

Today~
Halfway through the teaching, felt sleepy but managed to listen what the speaker had preach. Had lunch at 313 somerset. Went to Istana Park to play some games and devotion together while most of them went to mit6. Doesn wanna write much, but it's just the usual things that I have done.
So byee...

2009-12-03T00:54:00.002+08:00

It's gonna be 1am soon and I have just packed finish my stuffs for tomorrow chalet. Anyway, had great teaching today which I like it alot. Dinner with caregroup after that and some monopoly deal. Backed home by transport~
Troubled mind!!!
-friends
-money
-situation that I am occuring now.

Gonna meet clique for short meeting in friday time. Meeting boss before that for flyers and salary discussion and then some short meeting for games role etc for 3 days 2 nights chalet.

I am just not being treated what I really wanted in times. Feel rather depressed over this and made me drift away from them by keeping quiet mostly now. What's made the different is I feel more carefree when I am with clique, filled with less criticise and things that I can join in oftenly.

this is not I really want =(

2009-12-02T13:03:00.002+08:00

Had a bad nightmare yesterday which made my sister to shout vuglarities words at me =S
This nightmare is related to yesterday teaching about our strength and God's strength. I just could express that the dream is so frightening.
Morning wake up by myself =D , eat my lunch and went for a rest. Get scolded by Angel/XinYi for not able to come shopping with them at AMK hub. But I'll be spending much time with you all in tomorrow times.
Felt disappointed because Cindy wont be able to overnight with us due to some personal reason. It spoiled my entire mood because she is one of the closer friend in the clique. She abandoned me =( sobbing* Seriously feel very sad!!!

2009-12-01T20:33:00.002+08:00

back homed!
Devotion which I wanna apply is to spend personal time with God. Had prata after devotion and off to Mabel's house to play monopoly deal with the rest. Blindly follow them up the bus but didn't follow them at the end, alighted at Tampines interchange and train to meet SiRui for sheperding. Thank for the yogurt MuYong!
So... When I board the bus with a empty-thought, I started to think of something which is rather funny and I'm gonna share it here.
Thought: what if I buy 1 packet of pens to give for my CG members and pray for the pens(prayer: Dear God, I pray for this packet of pens that You may give blessing to those people who are using them and to let them remember of You when they see this pen. In Jesus name, AMEN!). I feel like laughing at myself for the weird thoughts that I would had. I wondered to myself whether anyone had done it before.(Haha)

Anyway~ This holiday has really need a fruitful time spending. So many useful teaching and fellow-shipping with one another that help and train me to be a better person. Just hope that this coming christmas service, I will do my best in bringing as many people as possible ^.^

2009-11-30T21:18:00.002+08:00

Got called to wake me up early in the morning. Prepared and bus to meet friends for taking stocks and start our work. Earn $6 an hour and off to tampines platform to meet Easta1. Went for CLC1 which we learn about how to be a great armour- bearer and follow-up on new believers. At the end of the lesson, we are asked by the instructors to form in different district of a lifegroup, group with NorthEast and JC people. Celebrated Gladys birthday as a group and shopped awhile and off transport home.
Tired~~~

2009-11-29T23:21:00.002+08:00

Went to shop with SiRui at Jurong Point today. Finally brought my hp straps and currently attracted by one jean =S , but haven shop finish the whole shopping mall although we spend 4 hours over there. Had yogurt twice and the chicken rice is nice. Help clique with their stocks at whitesand and bus to meet XinYi and MiQin. Stayed at XinYi's house awhile and ate 3 packets of chips and noodles over there as my dinner(thanks).
Meet one new friend over there! Playful Jasmine, doing all the action/talk that I had do, but still, my magic tone make her lost out, haha. But she is rather cute at her age of 8.
Wanna ask friends to buy for me as christmas gift this coming friday! =P
Homed before daddy and had some chat with Irene over phone. Don't get confused by what you are currently facing now, cause God is always gonna be with you.

Intending to buy more stocks tomorrow at 12am and meet clique for work. Hoping that I can go to KL with XinYi and her family at december. Haha! And she accepted to lend me $50 for KL shopping (so good eh).
But hopefully my grandma will give me the money for shopping instead of lending from my friends.

2009-11-29T02:38:00.002+08:00

Came home at 2.20am!!! Rather late but it's normal for me, could just express that the walk is tiredness and sleepy. Had 3 hours of tution tutor by Irene Koh, thanks alot that for your endurance ^.^ So I am now having math homework which is pretty much and I bet that I will rack my brain super hard =(
Went for night stroll while the rest play lan. It's quite well and great that I didn't get lost although I walk far away from where I am =)

Gonna do some quiet time and then finish my 30 questions or more homework...

I doesn want my mind to be controlled by friend, but to follow my own way and not others=D

2009-11-27T22:56:00.004+08:00

Rushing with some major stuffs which I haven done yet, but hopefully it will be done by today. Have great teaching today, went to sheperd course after easta training day teaching by Cheng Lee, wanna apply something from that teaching which is to have a vision with God so that life won't be so aimlessly. Yeah, and to change a mindset of "impossible" to "possible" although there are times whereby I have little faith on what I could do. I may fail to apply it, but I'm still willing to take up this challenge, to pray for people without fear and to do what my sheperd/CL ask me to do ^.^
And after teaching, went to sheperd course and learn much more over there. Really like the teaching alot which is teach by YanYu.
Application point: To perservance and not to give up in any circumstance. Because when we see success at the end, our joy and excitment is so huge that all the hard work is so small to us. And to accept each and every of people character even if they are very bad etc.

Had dinner at prime after that and homed~
Nite everyone!

to rely on God but not human being~

2009-11-26T09:26:00.002+08:00

It's just another day out for me!

It's 12.30am now and I am still using laptop when I am suppose to go sleep for tomorrow Easta training. Before Caregroup, cried alittle due to certain reason, but thanks Melissa for the encouragement to let me move on. A prayer to God before starting my role as a chairperson as I'm not a good speaker and also because of some reason. But thankfully, it went on smoothly=D Played monopoly deal and I lose badly =(
Bus to Sirui's house downstair to take cheesecake from her (thanks alot) and to Cindy's house to return her badminton racket. Bus homed after that~
Mapling and now wanna go off to sleep.
Awaiting for clique chalet at next week =D (Happy & excited)

night everyone!

2009-11-25T23:37:00.004+08:00

Rather tired now! Thank XinYi + Cindy for company/racket. Planner for clique outing which purpose to be during this week, but was packed for everyday, so wanna change it to next week instead. Finding the right day for us to go out once again together as a whole unit of clique, a butch of joyous and laughters that I am hoping and wanting to get now.
Browse the calender for next week free time, and hopefully I can make it for Friday and same goes to everyone. Working with clique next week to sell stationary which seem to earn a reasonable salary, but won't possible be much committed to working since it will be quite a hectic week for me to handle during this period of times.
Class gathering? Alright, didn't does what I am purpose to do which is to help Cas to find good ideas. hmm~ But Carin will be able to go since it's after camp which I will be free by then.

Reminder~( next week***)
30 & 2 dec currently having CLC1 from 2pm-6pm!
Clique shopping at 4/12/09 (Not confirm)
Working day (clueless =S ) tues & thurs if there is no devotion/Mon & wed b4 CLC1

Second thoughts

2009-11-25T19:34:00.005+08:00

Ended our last day work at Ang Mo Kio. Managed to do finish all the blocks that the boss have requested us to do. But was rather tired at times due to 5 hours of sleep only. Do Quiet time in the morning, 6.25am , since it's still early and wanna do it due to lack for timing at night^.^
And the most elated things that I wanna mention is about my salary, because it's like finally after 4 times of work and the salary is more then the expected pay that I got. But after some thoughts, realise that the $74 bucks have to be deducted due to my camp fee, so only got around $20+ left to keep as my daily allowance =) Although I knew about it and I'm sort of disappointed, but on second thoughts, this $45 buck is gonna spend on doing things that is wonderful and awesome + amazing =D I love my second thoughts alot!!
Bus homed after some window shopping at Ang Mo Kio hub and rush to bathe and currently eating my dinner now and off to sheperding at SiRui's house. Meeting XinYi to return guitar back to her =( No more guitar!!!

2009-11-24T22:59:00.002+08:00

it's a hurry morning that I recieved today. Overslept and didn't want to go devotion, thinking that I would rather do quiet time on my own instead of going over there. But this thought is really a satan thoughts, because at the end, I went and this devotion is rather meaningful to me alots due to the problem I am currently handling now. Yeah, and at that point of time, I really wanna thanks God that I managed to come to this devotion although I'm late.
Yeah, and instead of working with clique as a sales person, went to expo with them after devotion. And don't really feel like talking much in fear that I would let my emotional to get the better of me. But still, everything went on smoothly and Melissa went to my house till 8pm+
spend time with her talking about how unspiritual am I in the past few months ever since I join christ and all sort of funny things.
So, mood is still alright but last and not least thing that I need to overcome is to have the courage to meet SiRui alone.

I feel stronger then before when I face this situation. Thank Lord for the strength.

2009-11-23T23:24:00.003+08:00

I still break down at the end!
It's gonna be a disaster period for me to go through. A tough and hurtful life that I had to go through now. I need strength right now, someone I can totally rely on. Playing Maple isn't something that can totally make me forgot about the situation that I am in right now. Words just doesn goes what I should have done, but breakdown severly to the max that people started to questions me what had really happened to me when I told them that I am not feeling rather well. I don't know how to handle it and am confused about it totally. I'm at a lost right now! Thinking of commiting sucide, but second thought would be " would God forgive me if I really does that? ". It's not words that can really cure me totally, but my strength and support. I'm tramatize by it, but not totally. By fearing this thing would be spread among peoples and not hoping to see them. I doesn't know how to express my fear and hurt, but it's how you feel when your loved once died.
I dono whether my reaction is huge, but I'm me. My strength and courage is not that high.

thanks for the concern & joke , fives...

let me rely on You now Lord

2009-11-22T16:27:00.001+08:00

Sleep till 4pm. Just bathe and gonna go out with sister to expo + shopping mall later. It's gonna be our day spending time together~

Edited~
Out to expo John little sale was a success once, filled with seas of people whereby it took me an hour to reach the cashier point. Saw EA2 friends over there and helped them to pay their stuffs. Went to food exhibition for chicken ball and off to Tampines Inter by bus. Had our dinner at Macdonald and then bus home directly.
Didn't expect that this deep secret in me would be reveal out someday. Fearing was what I could express and sense now, but being running away from them is not a full-term solution. Mind is in a mess right now! But did I regret for what I had say?
In just a few hours time, gonna go for membership class. Haven bathe yet =S Went to my school to get my books and uniform for next year~ Saw Mdm Ena over there =D